Thursday, May 2, 2013

She's an Alien

I've become convinced that the boys' speech therapist is an alien ambassador to the Pod People who helps Pod Children who have been left behind find their way back home. Seriously, I can't tell you how many times I've brought her this:

and she's given me back this:

It's cute, they think the building she works at is her house. 

I mean really, she has GOT to be an alien! There's no way that my Pod Children  can get back home unless I put them to bed, so obviously she has to be an alien who may or may not have been sent specifically for my benefit. An alien gives my boys speech therapy and I don't mind it! Hopefully she's telling off all the Pod Mothers for stealing my sweet M and J so often. I use to feel bad for the Pod Mothers but now they just annoy me! 

Yeah.... she's definitely an alien

Tuesday, April 23, 2013


J has a thing where he hates being wet. Even one tiny bitty drop of liquid on his clothes means an entire outfit change. Sometimes it would annoy me so badly because he doesn't think about how something, like jumping in puddles, would get him wet. So he'd splash in one and then suddenly freak out about being wet, causing me to do a serious facepalm. I would get so frustrated and just tell him to deal with it half the time.

And then one day, I gave G a sucker. She got so sticky (of course). I went to clean her up and she grabbed my hand, getting her sticky fingers all over my skin. It felt like I had a ton of pins and needles in my skin and I jumped up and ran to wash it off. While standing there, washing the sticky off my hand as fast as I could, I realized that this must be how J feels when he's wet.

That epiphany got me thinking about J's other quirks that I don't take seriously enough...

Like the sun. I love the sun. It's so warm and lovely and I just love it.

While J reacts more like a vampire and hides from it. He whines when he gets in it.

I can only imagine what it feels like on his skin or in his eyes to make him react like that.

The sweet old lady commenting on how adorable the kids are....

Must seem like an absolute monster!

I mean seriously, no wonder he's always cowering from strangers!

Sometimes he puts up a huge fight when getting dressed in the mornings.

But I have to say, I don't know a single person who doesn't have at least a "Yes!" moment when they find their favorite shirt, clean and ready for wearing.

About 90% of the time, when something J is doing (or not doing) bugs me, there's an equivalent in me. Why is ok for me and not for him? It's all about the perspective.

Thursday, February 21, 2013


I don't know about you, but the world ends in my house quite often. I can't tell you how many times the hubby has looked at his phone and seen this:

But as often as it ends, it has never surpassed one certain world ending day back before J's diagnosis while I was still pregnant. *cue fog and mist and other visual aids to help rewind my flashback*

M had just started preschool a few months ago and we were just now really getting back into the groove of  things and finding a routine again. It was actually perfect because J had started fighting his one nap he had left and was more often than not turning into his pod-monster self.

With M in school, we were hopping into the car every day right around nap time and he was out like a light. Perfect! After awhile though, I started to notice that the pod people were forgetting to replace pod J with regular J after nap time and I was starting to think he would be better off without a nap all together. Then I got the idea that maybe he's scared when he wakes up because he's alone, so instead of laying him down in his bed, I would lay him on the couch. That way, he would wake up to watch the end of our after school movie and then we could all head outside until daddy came home.

It worked beautifully and I gave myself many pats on the back for figuring out how to keep his naps in. I was very pregnant at this point and not too happy about it so these little breaks were a life saver for me.I thought how amazing I was and was very smug about everything.

And then on this one fateful day, M wasn't interested in the after school movie. Instead he was playing a game on his hand held game system. None of us were watching the TV, so I turned it off.  What I didn't realize at the time was that, for whatever reason, the TV was the key.

So when J woke up:


Saturday, December 29, 2012

The Pod People

I'm going to let you in on a secret... We are not alone in this universe. There are aliens called the Pod People that steal your children and replace them with exact replicas of your kids, only all they do is scream and whine and are all together unruly.

See what I mean? My beautiful, amazing, well behaved, perfect children would NEVER act unruly. It's always the Pod children! Those poor Pod mothers. No wonder they switch their kids with ours, yah know? My kids are SO well behaved in fact, that they get picked by the Pod mothers a lot because I often have Pod children in my house. Go figure.

Thing is, Pod people can switch your kids with Pod kids in the blink of an eye. You can be sitting there with your sweet, lovely child, just loving on them... and then you blink and suddenly you've got a screaming, flailing, freaking out Pod child in front of you. The best way to get your child back, is to put the Pod child to sleep. The Pod people will come and switch the kid while they're sleeping and you find your child waking up happy and smiling again.

Pod mothers aren't perfect though, because there are times that your child wakes up only to be a Pod child still. The Pod children get even more pissed than they were before you put them to sleep because they should have been picked up by now and they haven't been. And of course, the Pod mothers can switch your kid with a Pod kid in the blink of an eye, but it doesn't work the other way around. You're stuck with that Pod kid until bed time! You can placate them a bit and make them less unruly, but it's definitely a Pod kid for the rest of the day.

And don't get me started on the days that the Pod mothers purposely leave the Pod kid for you to wake up to in the morning. Those days are never fun.

 So next time your child seems totally alien and unruly, they're definitely a Pod child! Put that kid to sleep and hope for the best!

Thursday, December 20, 2012

The Ultmate Game of Telephone

A while back,  M went through this phase of wanting to whisper in your ear all the time, only he wasn't whispering anything, just making whispering sounds. I don't really know where he got it from but I'm guessing he got from school. It kind of made me sad that he didn't realize people were actually saying things when whispering in his ears, so I made it my mission to help him understand.

As I kept trying to help him, I was remembering back in 6th grade when we would play a game called Telephone. We would all line up and then the teacher would whisper something into the first person's ear. By the time it got to the end, it was never the same as the beginning and more often than not, was quite hilarious to my 6th grade mind.

Something like this:

Would turn into this:

I decided to play this game with M because I thought if we incorporated funny phrases into it, that he would respond better. I was very curious to see if he would not only realize I was saying something, but see how much he would be able to understand as well.  With him being 5, I figured potty humor would be the best way to capture his attention long enough to listen to what I was whispering. I called him over and told him to tell daddy:

I was excited when he went to the edge of the couch to peer at daddy in the kitchen and tell him.

Only, he garbled what I said...

And it was still funny.

Friday, December 14, 2012

Visiting with Santa

We went and visited Santa the other day. It was totally on a whim though and had some serious world ending potential. We were running errands when we passed the place we did Santa pictures at last year. The Santa there is the best Santa ever, so we made a split second decision to go in. Right around this same time, we realized it was well past noon and we hadn't had lunch yet.

We pull into the the parkinglot and it is packed. I'm starting to get nervous. Empty bellies and a crowded shopping center are not a good combination. We'd been hyping Santa up every once in awhile for a few weeks now, but we haven't really been practicing what to say to him, so I drill into M what he's supposed to say the entire walk to the entrance. J doesn't even respond when I try to get him to say it. We're so doomed.

We get inside and J immediately tenses up. There was so much going on sensory wise. He's doing alright though, so I just walk as steadily as I can through the crowd, trying not to get too close to anything. We come up to the line waiting for Santa and it's not too long. We decide it's worth a shot and get in back. J comes from around me and sees the Christmas tree set up behind Santa. His eyes go all wide, like angels are singing and he yells out

It's cute, and I giggle a bit, but at the same time it makes me even more nervous. He tends to only yell random stuff like that when he's stressed. He'll do it when he's excited too, but he does not look excited.

There are wrapped empty boxes everywhere and the boys keep hitting them. G goes from the hubby's to my arms over and over again because she can't decide who she wants more. The line is going fast, though, so I'm hoping we make it through in one piece when my heart stops. J has gone into "Transformer Mode".

Transformer Mode is what I fondly call one of J's reactions to stress. His shoulders go all squared like he's a giant robot and he makes hydrolics sound effects with every step. He'll take a few steps and then he starts punching in slow motion like he's having an epic battle with something.

It also usually means he's only one more step away from an epic meltdown, aka the world ending. He starts slow motion punching M and they knock a few of the presents over.

I'm really really nervous at this point. I don't see how we're going to make it through this without some screaming. I mean, we haven't even eaten yet! If the world ends, J won't eat afterwards which will just make things ten times worse for the rest of the day. This is such a bad idea. Why did I think this was a good idea? Bad, bad idea.

The people before us go. I ask M what he's going to ask Santa for and he stammers out his answer. I'm proud of him that he said it without any help at all. Next thing I know, it's our turn. I take a deep breath and prepare for the end.  JOptimus disappears as I grab for the boys' hands and tell them it's our turn. J takes my hand and walks with me towards the chair. Santa is beckoning, but both boys are a little overwhelmed. I have to give them both a small nudge to get them to go up without me. M hangs back a bit while J approaches the smiling fat man and I hold my breath. This is the moment of truth.

J goes to the very edge of the platform and instead of going up further, he yells

I instantly relax. He spoke to Santa! I'm doing an inward happy dance. Santa beckons again and J steps onto the platform. I can see his hands shaking when he gets picked up by this strange man, but maybe he remembers him from last year, because he doesn't protest. M goes onto the platform and tells Santa what he wants. I grab G from the hubby and even she doesn't protest being set on his lap. Man this is the best Santa EVER!

We get a picture where none of them are crying and all of them are looking. This is awesome! I'm practically giddy with how well they're doing. I grab G back from Santa and hand her back to the hubby so I can help M answer all the questions Santa is asking him. J is staring off into space until Santa mentions a candy cane and then a perks right up and grabs his, holding it to himself like it's the last candy cane he'll see in his life.

I am just beaming. I don't know how we managed it because we had so many things going against us, but my rock star dudes (and babe!) pulled through like, well, rockstars!. Ah it's good to be a mom!

Sunday, December 9, 2012

Like Pulling Teeth

So, M has Auditory Processing Disorder. This Disorder is sometimes called "Dyslexia of the Ears". When you think of dyslexia, you think of someone looking at a book and seeing something different than what's written on the page, right? M's ears work much like that. He doesn't hear what you say unless he tries *really* hard. What 5 year old has a long attention span though?

Because of the whole not understanding a lot of what you say thing, M's communication is severely delayed. This makes conversing with him rather hard sometimes, kind of like pulling teeth. It's getting a lot better, but can still take quite a long time to get him to answer your question or even understand the question at all.

For example, the other day we were in the car on the way home around lunch time.